This is not the first time and it won’t be the last time also, still you have butterflies fluttering in your stomach. The very thought that she has agreed to go with you on a date is making you go weak by the knees. Yes, the gorgeous girl you have been eyeing for a while would be going with you on a date. You should be in seventh heaven now but you have an anxious feeling. What if the first date becomes the last one with her? How you can you ensure that you land up a second date?
First date and its magic
First dates are always magical. A first date will always remain a first date, whether you are in high school, college or in your thirties. The great feeling when someone yields to your proposal and decides to meet you, the satisfaction of being able to impress the special person whom you have been dreaming for quite some time and the pride of walking beside the most gorgeous girl you have ever met- that’s the magic of first date.
However, it is also associated with excitement, anticipation and apprehension. For some, it can get quite stressful when you try too hard to impress your lady.
Let us take the pressure off your shoulder and tell you the things that you need to do to ensure you land a second date with your love interest. It starts with conversation and we would define the steps you need to take so that you enjoy the first date while ensuring a second encounter.
“But that’s just the first impression”
No, it’s not, the first impression is much more than that. It is the image that gets created in the minds of the people and it is pretty much permanent. So, make sure that you create a favorable one if you are serious about going on a second date with her.
Take time to choose your attire. Remember, your outfit should suit the place you would be taking her. While a casual tee and jeans is okay for a coffee date, if you are taking her to an upscale restaurant, you need formal attire. Make sure to get a nice hair cut and do not forget to trim your nails.
Be punctual and reach the venue on time. Remember, on time means at least five minutes before the scheduled time. Reaching earlier would help you to settle down and remain calm and composed to conduct the date according to your plan.
“Let’s plan it, baby”
Yes, a great date needs to be planned. From choosing the venue to what you would be wearing to the jokes you would be telling her, a thorough planning would see you sailing smoothly into a second date. So, plan your date.
Choose a location and timing suitable to both of you. Ideally the place should not be too far from her home. Get prior reservation so that you do not have to wait too long at the restaurant.
You should also plan what to gift her on the first date and the things you would tell her. Of course, do not make it like a formal meeting where you would be talking on topics and ticking them off the to-do list, but a rough draft always helps in making a date successful.
“Words, words are all I have”
Yes, words are your strongest weapon when it comes to impressing a girl. So, you better watch out every word you utter. In fact, whether you can amaze a girl and make her want to meet you again depends mostly on your conversational skills. So, from here onwards we would share tips on what to say and how to say so that you naturally win a second date with your lady love.
“Say you will remember me”
Yes, she will remember you if you can connect to her heart. That’s simple. You need to take interest in her and make her talk and share her thoughts. Always remember that women love to talk and if she can do the same with you, you have won the initial round. However, you need to be genuine.
Ask her questions that she would like to answer. This could be about her profession and hobbies. Make her talk on how she got into the job and what she likes most about it. If a girl is passionate about her work, this would set the ball rolling. Maintain eye contact while she speaks and listen to her. Listen to her as she talks about her dreams and plans. Comment suitably so that you find more topics to converse.
If your girlfriend has a hobby like painting or singing, you would find more things to talk about. You may also ask her to show you her work. Make genuine efforts to understand her and that would make the date exciting.
“You found a way inside my heart”
Won’t it be nice if she says this about you? She would if you say the right things and do the right things at the right moment. Let’s give you an example. If you go through any dating website for tips on impressing a girl, you would find the experts telling you to compliment your girl on her looks and outfit. However, you need to do it subtly and genuinely. “The pearl necklace suits your complexion” or “your earrings match your dress beautifully” doesn’t sound better than a simple “You are beautiful”?
Greet her when she arrives with a warm handshake and a smile on your face along with a nice compliment and walk straight into her heart.
“You are special”
Yes, your date needs to feel special when she is with you. From the venue you choose, the gift you get her to the things you tell her, everything needs to convey your feelings for her.
Did she ever tell you that she loves Lebanese food? Or that she likes gazing at the stars? Do you know what her favorite color is? If you had paid attention to her, you would have known these little things about her which would help you to plan a romantic date. You can get flowers of her favorite color, take her to a restaurant that serves her favorite cuisine and take her for a walk by the seaside where she can gaze at the stars.
Create a romantic atmosphere that would make the date special. You can tell her what made you fall in love with her, what you found special in her or how you remember the first time you met her. Tell her things about yourself that she would enjoy like your childhood memories or interesting incidents from your life.
“You make me smile”
If you can make her smile, you can win her heart too. Most girls like guys who can make them smile. So, remember to create a good stock of jokes that you can tell her on the first date. However, there is a fine line between making her laugh and acting like a clown and you should tread on it cautiously.
So, do not just tell the jokes flatly but time them well. May be you can tell one-liners while enjoying your drink. A safe bet would be to make fun of your habits so that your woman can get idea about your nature and also know that you are okay with revealing yourself. A person who can crack joke on himself is a confident guy and your lady would never fail to notice it.
Choose the jokes wisely. Avoid jokes pertaining to the profession of your ladylove. Similarly, stay away from sexist jokes. Clean, funny and witty jokes would bowl her over and help you win a second date with her.
“And in walks her prince charming”
How nice it would be if she thinks this way about you! Well, maybe not on the first date, but surely you can make her feel this on the second one. You must be eager to know how. Well, you have to make your charm work on her through your words and action.
You can win in the first round by dressing up well and smelling nice. The choice of the venue comes next. If she likes art, you can meet her in a museum or art gallery and impress her with your attentiveness. Additionally you would get plenty to talk about and later on you can head towards a restaurant for your meal.
If she loves fun and excitement, an amusement park would be a good choice. By choosing something unique like an opera, museum or an entertainment park as the spot you would straightaway win a few brownie points. Look directly into her eyes when you talk, gently touch her elbow as you lead her into the restaurant, pull the chair for her, ask her whether she is comfortable and always make sure that she likes your company.
Depending on the place you choose to meet you have to conduct the conversation. If it is a quiet place, you can sit beside her and whisper sweet nothings into her ear as she sips on her drink. If you are alone on a beach or a park, hold her hand lightly and walk beside her.
Be polite, smile frequently and take cues from the conversation to find new topics to talk about. Charm her with your behavior, your manners and become her prince charming.
“Cause every time we touch, I get this feeling”
Touch is really a touchy matter and you need to watch yourself carefully. Some would tell you to abstain from touching; they may advise against kissing on first date while you would find others who encourage you get bold and kiss and make her fall for you. Well, at the end it depends on the type of person you and your date is.
If you find her daring, you can get bold too. If she flirts with you or answers back your one-liners with similar jokes, go ahead and show you how good a lover you can be. However, if she remains reserved, feels awkward if you try to get close, it’s better to control yourself.
“Nice guys finish last” – not always
There is a popular myth about nice guys finishing last. Most people are made to believe that girls love to date bad boys. Well, bad boys do have their own charm but when it comes to long term dating or relationship prospects, it’s the good guys who win the race. This is simple because of the fact that good guys know how to behave in public.
Men who show respect to women, elderly and other people earn the respect of their girlfriends easily. So, watch out your behavior when you are on a date. The way you talk to the valet or waiter would help in creating a favorable first impression.
Do not be rude to anyone and if you have to make your point, speak in a firm voice. If you can control your temper under any provocation and can still win the situation, your girl would respect you a lot. This pretty much sums what you should say on the first date to make sure you get to take her out on a second date.
In fact, what you say is equally important to what you don’t say. Ask anyone whose calls after first date were never received because he bragged about his job or made a few silly comments about the family of the girl.
“Things I’ll never say”
It’s very important to learn what not to say on a date. It often happens that you may get carried away in the conversation and say certain things that hurt her sentiment. You need to avoid topics that may make her uncomfortable. Don’t say anything that disrespects her life or career. You may not like the things she prefers or is passionate about but that doesn’t mean you would say anything negative about them. Don’t show your desperation by being too pushy or aggressive. Do not say anything that intimidates her or makes her to think otherwise.
Don’t brag. This is the most common mistake that guys make. To impress a girl they say things that are not true which puts off the girl. Refrain from discussing your salary or the perks you get from office.
Stop fiddling with your mobile. Yes, we know you are busy and WhatsApp is your life support system but you can surely switch it off for a few hours when you are out with a girl for the first time. Just imagine how it would look if you check your mobile every few minutes halting the conversation. So, be wise and put your mobile on silent mode. This would also show her that you value her presence and make her feel special.
Don’t sugarcoat your opinions to please her. Initially she may like you agreeing to whatever she says but eventually it may make her think that you lack personality. So, it is better to speak your own mind when required.
It’s better to not drink on first date if you have a record of getting drunk and creating nuisance. So, go for wine or beer or better, fruit juices.
Don’t get late on your first date and don’t appear with a sloppy look. Untrimmed hair, dirty nails and a crumpled tee is the least that your date expects you to turn up in. You better take a note and start preparing at least a couple of days before by getting your shirts pressed and shoes polished.
Did she keep quiet when you were speaking about your grandparents? Did she dodge your question on what her father does? Well, not everyone is blessed with a happy family and you need to understand this. If she avoids questions on her family or anything else, you better leave these topics aside.
Is she shuffling her hands? Is her gaze fixed on something else? Maybe she is not interested in whatever you are saying. If you find your date showing signs of impatience, you should change the topic. Talk on something that would interest her and make her enjoy your company.
Other than these, there are some issues that are completely no-no on a first date like talking about your ex or asking about her past relationships. Past baggages are to be left at home when you go out with someone for the first time.
A date is about only two people and if it the first one, you need to make sure that every moment becomes magical. Make it only about you two and your feelings and give romance a chance to blossom by blocking out distractions. Mobile phones, loud atmosphere and even television in the restaurant may prevent you from conversing. So, choose a place where you can talk freely, be yourself and enjoy each other’s company.
From the way you wave at her and say hello, the compliments you shower on her to the topics you choose and the way you behave with others, you need to be careful about every conversation you engage into in your first date. Make it so romantic, so beautiful and enigmatic that you are assured of a second one before she wishes you goodnight. If the first date is grand enough, you do not have to wait to call her up and fix another date, it would naturally happen. That’s what love and attraction is all about, right? So be confident, watch your every step and let the magic happen. Go tiger, get yourself a second date!