A lot of men visit Thailand every year with the sole aim to have sex with as many Thai girls as possible during their stay. A quick search on the internet will quickly notice a recurring theme:
Come to Thailand and meet the sexy girls, where you are guaranteed to find the Thai girls of your dreams and live a happy fun filled holiday.
That’s the kind of over simplified headline you see every day on the internet.
On this page
- What are Thai girls really like?
- Personalities of Thai girls
- Physical intimacy with Thai girls
- Do Thai girls have more relaxed views on prostitution?
- The best way to meet and date Thai girls
- How to spot ladyboys?
- How to spot the crazy ones?
- Relationships with bar girls
- Do Thai girls care about your age or looks?
- Are Thai girls easy to bed?
- So what kind of a girl is right for me?
Its fairly common to see a lot of men come to Thailand seeking a girlfriend perhaps, to marry and seek a more long term relationship in general. Indeed its very common a lot of people in the former group to turn into the latter. But often, the single biggest mistake they make is they look for it in the wrong place as you will see later in this article.
Given the fact that you’re reading this article, there’s a good chance you’re either just looking for some quick action or are contemplating a long term relationship with a good Thai girl. The good news for you is, you’re not alone! The thousands of foreigners visit Thailand for a sex holiday, but often end up in long term relationships with Thai girls.
The old saying goes that there is someone for everyone and in Thailand that is definitely the case for a single white male. The reason being, Thai girls tend to favour Western men over all other races including Thai. Some say it’s because they like the skin tone, others say it’s to do with our build but one thing is for sure, there are plenty of reasons why Thai girls love Western guys and prefer to steer clear of the average Issan village kind of guy.
If you’re ready and open to explore the world of Thai girls then get comfortable because this might take a while but by the end, you will know everything you need to make the most of the journey ahead of you. A journey of adventure and excitement. I’ll show you the best way to meet university girls and reveal the secrets to turn your online dates into an offline one in the shortest possible time. You’ll also learn how to avoid the biggest mistakes that could leave you with an empty wallet and a broken heart. Let’s just say it’s going to a wild ride.
Be warned though, once you’ve dated a genuine Thai girl, there’s no way you’re going back to dating girls from your home country. So proceed only if you can deal with that!
Now, some of you are probably thinking to yourselves, “Why Thailand and why Thai girls?” That’s definitely a good question and here are some of my answers:
What are Thai girls really like?
You definitely won’t run out of pretty girls to pick from in Thailand, no doubt! From skinny and hot pale skinned women to some of the tanner yet stunningly beautiful girls, they are definitely a treat for our eyes! While you may think that other countries also boast their own beautiful list of hot girls. There’s no other place like Thailand that delivers a uniquely classy look while keeping that drop dead beauty!
If I had to summarize what women from different parts of the country look like, this is how I’d do it:
Women from Northern regions of Thailand are cutest, those from the East are the sexiest, and those from the Central and Southern regions are the hottest. Of course, it’s just my personal opinion, so take that with a pinch of salt.
The obsession with white skin and silky hair
I’ve always heard that Thai girls are super crazy about the hair and beauty products they use in their everyday lives. They go the extra mile to find out what is actually good for their hair or skin. And you’ll definitely notice it the first moment you step out of that aeroplane. Their hair is the kind of hair you see in commercials from supermodels!
Face of an angel body built for sin!
Let’s face it. Compared to the girls in Thailand, a lot of western girls have very large and plump bodies. It’s just a different gene set (and a lot less McDonalds). And I won’t judge because that’s actually a good thing for a lot of guys who are into big bodied women.
Now if you’re like me and love a girl with a nice, slim figure then Thai girls are definitely for you. You’ll notice how slim and fit their bodies are the moment you lay your eyes on one! There’s definitely a big difference between a western girl and Thai girl when it comes to their bodies.
Just tuning in to some Thai TV programs has made me realize how slim and petite they really are! I’ve dated my own fair share of western girls and some of them were definitely slim too, don’t get me wrong. But most of the girls I dated in Thailand had near perfect bodies! Don’t take my word for it, just search it on any search engine and you’ll know! Just be sure you are on a girls page and not a ladyboys page. See advice above for pointers.
Of course, it’s not all about the looks right? I know a lot of guys out there look more on the personality of a girl rather than her physical traits (although you definitely won’t lose if you’re just looking for the physical traits of a woman when looking for a Thai girl!)
I’ve definitely met my fair share of girls in my adventures here in Thailand and here are some of the personality traits you should probably expect when dating them:
Personalities of Thai girls
Many men have also come to me, asking me “I’ve picked the wrong girl for me! What should I do?”
While many women share similarities with one another, no one Thai woman is ever the same. There are many different types of Thai girls out there as there are many different types of men as well.
Some of the girls you’re going to meet come from poor families and are very down-to-earth while others come from the middle-class part of the Thai society. You will probably also get to meet some girls from the higher echelons of Thailand’s wealthier families whose financial income will not only rival yours but will probably even surpass it! Some of these girls worked hard to get to where they are so they know what life is about.
Some of these girls simply inherited their vast wealth and know nothing about spending it or making good use of it. You need to truly understand the psyche of a Thai girl in order to have a better chance of finding someone you like. Here are some examples:
Poor Thai girls with a limited educational background
You will find plenty of these girls in the northern parts of Thailand (Isaan) and if you are looking for a simple, down-to-earth girl that will understand your needs and you plan to settle down in Thailand, then these girls may be for you for you. While it’s not an ideal situation, if you’re planning to get into a relationship with someone in this group, we recommend you read through the next few paragraphs to make yourself aware of the additional complexities that may arise in such a relationship.
Poor Thai girls from the northern parts of Thailand (Isaan and surrounding regions for the most part) usually have limited education compared to their counterparts hailing from middle class or well to do families in Thailand. Ability to speak English might be non-existent. This might make it difficult to carry on long conversations unless the two of you choose to learn each other’s languages. This is changing gradually as more and more have access to the internet and try to learn from TV shows etc. Don’t be too surprised to find yourself dating a Jersey Shore clone or someone from a music video. They pick up the mannerisms and the accent and it can be quite funny and endearing. I once dated a girl who kept saying
“Oh my gawddddd” in a thick New Jersey accent. Ok she got annoying after a month but it was fun for a while.
Considering their limited education, they find it difficult to get a regular job, which means you will be the primary bread winner of the family.
This type of relationship might be ok for you if you’re planning to settle down in Thailand, because given her limited English (or whatever language is spoken in your country) ability, she may have a difficult time socializing with other people in your home country which could lead to loneliness and frustration for her although more and more I see Thai girls living in many countries around the world and they always find each other with, you guessed it….. Social media. So get her a phone and an internet connection and things could be perfectly fine. She will also love the chance to talk with family back home via Skype etc. And when she is happy you can be assured she will make you happy too. It might also be a good idea for you to learn Thai if you’re going to settle down in Thailand and get accustomed to the life in Thailand.
Another challenge that she is likely to face is because she comes from a poor family she will be constantly judged for being a gold digger especially if there is a significant age difference between you two. Like it or not, there are always judgemental people. Some will automatically assume she is a Pattaya bar girl and you will have to proactively protect her from being unfairly judged.
Speaking of the age difference, a girl from a poor family is likely to make bigger compromises and “settle” for less with regards to their partner. She might be willing to get into a relationship with someone twice her age even though it might not be her first choice. However, I recommend you keep the age difference between you and your partner to a reasonable gap because people in vastly different age groups tend to have vastly different lifestyles and this could take a toll on your relationship pretty quickly.
On the positive side, one great thing about dating poorer girls from Thailand is that they tend to have simple tastes. If you’re not the type of guy who likes to showboat and please everyone, then you’ll probably do well with these girls. They will appreciate even the simpler things that you give them so long as they come from your heart.
Simple gifts will do just fine. Simple dates in simple places like a homely dinner in their local town will be more than enough. It’s more of the quality and less of the quantity with these girls. Just make sure that they feel loved and they will love you back with all of their heart.
In short, you will have to carry most of the relationship with these girls because they usually tend to be insecure about their upbringing in life. They will be happy to play second fiddle to you and will need lots of assurance that you love them because love is one of the things that keep them together despite the hard times them and their families might be facing.
Middle class girls
Middle-class girls from Thailand usually have worked hard to get to where they are. You can expect most of them to have a college degree at-least. Most of the time, these girls will have a regular day job or own a small business and earn enough to support themselves.
These women are mostly concentrated in the urban regions of Thailand and are used to a modern lifestyle. Ability to speak English will be middling to good in most cases. You’ll be able to easily carry off a conversation on various topics with the women in this group.
Exposure to western culture is limited to what they might have seen in the movies or television. So while they might not be completely used to western culture, cuisine or lifestyle, it won’t be completely alien to them either. Adaptability to a western lifestyle will also be high if you plan to settle down in your home country.
They will have a say in all family matters, but might be willing to give in to your opinion on important decisions.
Your odds of hitting it off are highest with a woman in this group because the social compatibility is fairly high in most cases. If you find such a person and plan to settle down with her in your home country, chances are she’ll be able to find a job there and lend a helping hand with the family finances. If this is the kind of girlfriend you’re looking for, online dating apps are your best bet to find them, because you certainly won’t find them in Thai bars
The rich and affluent girls.
The very wealthy girls of Thailand! To my surprise, there are actually a lot of them! From my experience, I would split them into two groups.
The ones who were driven and made their wealth through hard work and perseverance and the ones who spend most of their nights clubbing, drinking and just wasting away their lives wherever they can with their dad’s credit card.
Do yourself a favour and don’t date the girls who inherited their wealth. Don’t get me wrong though! I’ve actually met some girls who were rich from their inheritances and some of them were really nice and realistic. But that’s a rarity that I’m pretty sure most men wouldn’t be willing to take a chance on.
Then there are the girls who worked hard for the most part in their lives in order to achieve the wealth they have now. These girls are all different, ranging from business women, high ranked employees, investors, doctors, lawyers, etc.
Getting to know these girls would probably be great because they would teach you a thing or two about how to make money for free if you got to know them well! These girls also had great quality education early on in their lives so the language barrier won’t be a problem at all.
However, since these girls are used to the high life, they’ll probably expect the same from you as well.
They’ll want to know that their boyfriend is capable of supporting himself because they won’t want to date a male gold-digger! They will naturally expect their boyfriends to have a similar social and economic status on their own and perhaps also a decent educational background.
They’ll also want you to show them that you know how to treat a lady well. They won’t necessarily appreciate the simpler things and will want to see that you can play with them at their level. They will also open up many opportunities in Thailand for you and your business.
They will have an equal say in all family matters and your relationship will truly be on equal terms.
To some guys, these girls are usually too hard to maintain and they end up having broken relationships. I do know some guys who were willing to take the challenge and actually succeeded in having happy relationships with these women.
The only way you’ll be able to meet such girls though is through direct introduction via your friends and associates or via some elite match making agencies.
Physical intimacy with Thai girls
Don’t let the shy and generally conservative nature of the regular girls that you see on TV or in the movies sway your opinion.
Ever since I came to Thailand several years ago, I’ve made friends with many men from all over the world who later went on to be in relationships with a woman as their Thai girlfriends or spouse and it’s extremely rare that I have heard any of them complain about the lack of physical intimacy with regards to their Thai partner. If anything, they only had praises for having found a new, happy and an exceptionally satisfied life when it comes to physical intimacy with their partners. The fact that they are very private in public gives way to stories and gossip that they are cold and unlovable but this couldn’t be further from the truth.
Don’t believe me? Do a Google search to find people complaining about an unsatisfactory sex life with a Thai woman. What you will see are numerous sex related stories but none of them will mention a poor sex life. Of all the things you’ll find people complaining about, lack of physical intimacy isn’t going to be one of them.
Do Thai girls have more relaxed views on prostitution?
We’ll let a Thai women who co-authored this article answer this question in her own words:
The question here is not as easy to answer as you would imagine.
First up you have to ask yourself this, if you were asked a very personal question like that would you answer it honestly? I think if you were completely honest with yourself the answer would be no or it’s unlikely.
This is also true for Thai girls. So while the ones you ask may say that Prostitution is disgusting or frowned upon or tell you they would never do something like that. The simple truth is many are lying or to put in a fairer term, they are too embarrassed to tell you the truth.
Being a Thai woman who has lived in Thailand most of their life I can tell you this is an accurate assessment.
I know many girls both in the trade and outside of it and while they may not like prostitution they are certainly more open and aware of its benefits especially in regions where there is very little else to do to feed their families.
Many will not talk openly about it but if it’s what they need to do then they will simply go and do it and just not talk about it. Of course if you ask their friends or family where they have gone you will get made up stories or flat out replies of “mind your own business” but for the most part this is to save face but both parties know that the other knows exactly what’s going on.
You will also find that many Thai girls will be very accepting of others if this is the path they have to take and will often help take care of the girls child or parents while the girl is away working.
In truth the only Thai girls that will be “or pretend to be offended and disgusted are the “Hiso” crowd.
Hiso being the term Thais use for upper class high society girls. In reality many of these are married into the Hiso life and were probably in the game at some point and landed themselves a white knight.
Of course there are many Thai girls that will be against the profession but no more than in any other country and I would guess it to be far less.
Many of the cleaners and food vendors would jump at the chance to make more money and perhaps meet their Knight but without being cruel they just don’t have the looks to be able to do it and have to make do with the lower paid work to get by. Obviously I am not suggesting that all cleaners etc want to be prostitutes but ask yourself this, when was the last time you saw a beautiful Thai girl cleaning a toilet or selling street food? Yes there are a few but not many.
For the lucky ones born into money they will go to college or get a job with an airline etc. but even still some of them will resort to prostitution to supplement their money or simply because they like the excitement and the fun of being wined and dined and bought gold etc.
I know a very well educated girl that has been in and out of the game all her life and could have a regular decent paying job but chooses to live the Gogo girl lifestyle.
So to sum up, yes Thai girls do have comparatively more relaxed views on prostitution. It’s a necessary evil that has given many a life they would never have had without it.
The best way to meet and date Thai girls
Thai girls are very very friendly, approachable and so easy to get along with – provided to cross the first and only barrier – don’t come off as an obnoxious sex tourist. If you’re nice to them and respect them and their culture, they’ll return it in kind. Once you’ve crossed the “sex-tourist” barrier, you’ll have absolutely no problem in making friends.
Given how Thai guys mistreat their women, you can have a huge leg up by just being nice. Be polite. Make a joke. You’d be surprised how receptive Thai girls can be by just being nice to them!
And once they accept you as their partner, Thai girls will happily open the floodgates to your deepest, wildest fantasies. Trust me, they know how to treat their men right! And you’ll have a far far better time having a real girlfriend than visiting the seedier areas of Thailand. If you’re one who is only looking for some short time fun, that fine – we won’t judge you. I personally know plenty of people started of that way, but ended up in a committed relationship soon enough.
Best Thai dating apps
With the explosion of internet and Thai singles apps, it has now become easier than ever to find a woman via online dating in Thailand. It’s really easy to find thousands of beautiful women on Thai dating apps. ThaiCupid is the grand-daddy of all Thai dating apps and you’ll find atleast a thousand women online at any time. Another alternative is Tinder. While Tinder does not have as many users online, the crowd there is younger of the two.
But finding one and finding the right one are two very different things. You can easily find a date but after the first meeting will she be the one that you stay with or will she be like one of those Bar Girls you have heard about in Thailand that only wants you for your money? There is no doubt that these GoGo girls exist but are all Thai girls the same? Is the Thai girl you meet going to be a real girlfriend or is she going to be a Walking Street professional and take you for everything she can get from you?
A lot of these girls come from very poor areas like Issan and move to Phuket or Pattaya to make a living in the bar industry. They usually find jobs working as a bar girl in what a called as Gogo bars. They do it in the hope that one day they will meet their White Knight and break free from the game to go on to live a happy life.
So how do you meet a good girl and find a Thai girlfriend that’s different from the ones you have heard stories about? It’s all great fun to partake in the Pattaya nightlife when it’s for a week or two but when you want a permanent girlfriend well that’s a whole other story. What we are about to show you is everything you will need to spot the gold diggers and opportunists. We will show you how to not only find a Thai girl but how to find a decent Thai girl and hopefully make her your girlfriend and possibly Thai wife all going well.
When dating Thai girls…
Dating Thai girls is really easy. If you’re not already in Thailand, your best bet is via a Thai dating app. Just install on your phone and you’re all set to meet and chat with thousands of pretty, single Thai girls (and other Asian girls from South East Asia). If you’re already in Thailand, you should still consider online dating as it gives you an opportunity to chat with thousands of potential partners and get to know them before you decide to meet in person. Moreover, if you’re planning to visit Thailand soon, it’s a great way to get to know someone online first and make a plan to meet them in person when you arrive.
Once you’ve met someone you like and are planning to meet in person, you need to make yourself aware of Thai dating culture. We have an entire post dedicated for you so you can knock her socks off in your very first encounter. It’s important to make yourself familiar with Thai dating culture and take advantage of the dating tips to impress your potential girlfriend. It’s important because you’d want to come off as a nice guy and not yet another sex tourist. You’re surely not the first person to have asked her out, and there is a good chance she is going to be judging if you’re boyfriend material. So I strongly recommend you read through the linked article because the rules of engagement when dating a good girl in Thailand are vastly different from what you might be used to back home or even what you might have read elsewhere.
Don’t be… too shy!
If you’ve ever dated a Thai girl before, you’ll probably know that a lot of them are incredibly shy! You’re most likely going to make the first move when it comes to these girls so make sure to practice those pickup lines! They being shy is also a good thing as it’s not fun to hang around with a woman that’s loud and noisy, for me anyway. I’m more into girls who are a little quiet yet are fun, gentle and kind.
I’d actually prefer being with a girl who’s shy than being in a relationship with a woman who talks a big game but doesn’t have anything to show for it. Shy girls tend to hide their talents so you’re in for a lot of surprises the more you get to know them, which is really fun in my opinion!
Dating a shy girl is like slowly opening your Christmas present. The more you peel from the gift wrapper, the more of the gift you see you’re probably thinking right now “Okay, I’m game with dating a shy girl. But what if they’re so shy that they end up being a killjoy?”
Don’t worry; I was worried about that too at one point!
How to spot ladyboys?
Thailand is home to one of the biggest Transvestite population in the world. So much so, you’d be hard pressed not to come across some Ladyboys or Kathoey as they are called locally. Now a word of warning. Never call a ladyboy a Kathoey to her face. They hate that word and regard it as an insult so if you don’t want to feel a size 9 stiletto up your rear end its good to keep that in mind
Here’s a pop quiz for you. Which among these is a ladyboy?Click on the image to find out how many you got right!
The lines between a regular woman and a ladyboy are often blurred here in Thailand. And it’s not uncommon for people to find themselves in a situation where they make a move on a woman only to realize she isn’t. On the other hand, some people actively seek out ladyboys for company. We got so many requests from readers asking us how they can tell if someone is a ladyboy or not we wrote an entire article on their life and lifestyle including a detailed section on how to spot ladyboys because it can get darn difficult to tell and lady and a beautiful ladyboy apart.
How to spot the crazy ones?
As you may already know, Thailand is naturally a beautiful country with a lot of naturally beautiful women in it. But it’s also a country with a dark side – you only need to take a trip to places like Phuket or Pattaya to experience the seedier side of things. The Pattaya nightlife is definitely not for the weak or the faint hearted and can ruin a man very quickly if he is not careful. You only need to Google “Walking Street Pattaya nightlife” to see exactly what I mean. If you don’t know how to handle yourself in Thailand, I assure you; you’re definitely gonna get burned. Don’t worry though, because with a little bit of help from this article and some common sense you will be on your way to a happy future with the girl of your dreams. Beyond all the glitz and the glamour of Thai nightclubs and bars lies a very deep social circle that can only be penetrated by the elite few. The ones that know how to avoid the tourist traps and undesirable elements that the “newbies” fall into.
How to spot gold diggers?
If you don’t pay heed to my advice here, you can be sure you’ll end up with a broken heart and an empty wallet. Ignore at your own peril. I strongly recommend you make yourself familiar with all the dating scams that are out there so you don’t find yourself in a situation you’d regret later. Any Thai girl that is currently in Pattaya or Phuket please avoid unless you want your new girlfriend to be like a GoGo dancer and “GoGo” away with all your money or at least double (even triple) ensure she has a darn good reason to be in these places.
I can tell you from experience that Thai girls can have a bad side too! Despite the beauty that Thailand offers the many people that live there, there’s no doubt that it still suffers from a lot of economic issues and these issues often spawn people who want nothing but your cold, hard cash.
Some women have found out that the best way to make a lot of money is by dating foreigners on online dating sites and by fooling them into a relationship where the guy gives them money all the time to make them happy. You should realize that your girlfriend shouldn’t need your money in order for her to be happy in your arms. Such women are very prominent in Thailand’s red light districts (Pattaya or Phuket in particular) and if you don’t know how to spot one, you’ll probably end up getting victimized by their endless games. Here are a few excellent ways on spotting scammers and gold diggers whose only intention is to part you with your money.
But before you paint everyone with the same brush, or misjudge someone, let’s first understand what a gold digger is and is not.
A person’s financial stability is a key factor that plays an important role in any woman’s decision in choosing a potential mate. Which is a logical and realistic trait. After all, in a long term relationship, there are bound to be ups and downs, and money can be a cushion to some degree. It’s also natural for a woman to be concerned about herself and her children’s future when getting into a relationship with someone.
So while someone who genuinely loves you will value you more than anything else, a gold digger will value your ability to provide for her more than anything else. And a good person will appreciate your financial resources as well as your relationship. However, a gold digger will appreciate only your financial resources. Such a person will likely leave you for greener pastures as soon as your ability to provide for them with a lavish lifestyle stops.
Money is usually the subject at hand when it comes to gold diggers. They usually demand and command you to buy high priced bags, gadgets and other glamorous items for them. While we’ve met a lot of girls who want presents from their boyfriends to make them feel special, there’s a difference between a girl who wants a loving present versus someone who wants nothing from you but your money. If you start to notice that your girl is always demanding something expensive from you then that’s probably a good sign to leave because chances are, she appreciates your wallet more than yourself! And believe me; I’ve dated such people before. They’ll suck you dry then leave you as soon as the money stops flowing.
All about the money.
There are different types of scam artists working the naïve foreigners on holiday in Thailand. The experienced scammer might fool you by talking about your hobbies and the things that interest you. She will bide her time and work the long con. Eventually, though the conversation will lead to them asking you for money. It will happen subtly and usually target your heart strings before it targets your wallet. It will feel like its random and unplanned but these conversations are far from unplanned. These girls have the patience of a surgeon and the skills to cut deep into your heart.
A vast majority of them are just there for the free ride and make no mistake they have no intention of being your loving girlfriend. The chances are they have 10 more guys just like you on speed dial and when the free ride is over you get deleted and they move on to be another victims problem. These girls never have a problem finding a date and can transform from Bar girl to GoGo dancer to goody goody Thai girlfriend in the blink of an eye. Next thing you know you’re walking the Khaosan Road with a pocketful of small change and a broken heart wondering where it all went wrong.
If she always talks about money and about how poor her family is and about how much you’d be able to help her if you’d give her some money then you’ve most likely got yourself a scammer. This is not to say that you should never date a girl from a poor family, but you should definitely be careful when doing so because there is a definite difference between a girl who looks toward the future by dating a man who can support himself and a family if need be and a girl who just wants some cash right up front.
If you start to notice that your girlfriend wants you to take her on nightclubs and hot spots most of the time whenever you’re together then there’s definitely a high chance that the girl you’re dating is going to be a high maintenance high-cost problem. The girl you’re dating should be content wherever you guys go.
Sick buffalo syndrome
This particular type of gold digger can be hard to spot because some sincere girls really do have family problems and some of them might come to you for some financial assistance. Gold diggers usually create sob stories that often trick foreigners into giving them their money because someone in their family is sick or dying or their cousin needs some money to go to school. While it’s okay for your partner to ask some financial assistance from you sometimes, it’s another story if she wants you to pay for everything that her family “needs”.
Another set of girls you want to avoid are those who are extremely eager to marry you for the sole purpose of settling in a foreign country and getting a foreign visa. There girls will leave for another guy as soon as they’ve landed a visa.
This type of sob story scamming we commonly refer to as Sick Buffalo Syndrome.
If you read stories of Thai girls and the games they play you will invariably see a reference to a sick buffalo.
The following is taken from a mixture of many stories over the years. It’s a fictitious email from a Thai girl to her White Knight (nickname for a guy that takes care of the girl)
The spelling mistakes are intentional as they are in typical “bar girl speak”. This email is a combination of many stories handed down by Falangs as a warning put in a humorous way.
We don’t know who the original author of this absolutely hilarious masterpiece is, but if you do happen to know, please let us know in the comments below!
When in doubt, consider asking yourself these questions:
- When you go on a date or shopping how often does your date share the expenses?
- Is her affection directly correlated to how much money you’ve spent on her?
- Are you being emotionally blackmailed into buying stuff, even though she knows very well its well beyond your means?
- Does she make snide remarks if you don’t buy the most expensive things for her or treat her to expensive dinner dates?
- How do they react if you suggest they sell some of their non-essential items (such as jewellery or other luxury items they own) that would help them tide over their “troubles?”
- How do they react if you suggest you want to quit your current high paying to job to pursue a career you’ve always dreamed of as a child, even though you know it does not pay well financially?
- Have they shown any signs of generosity or compassion towards others?
I hope that by asking these questions you’ll be able to tell for yourself whether the person you’re dating is a gold digger or pure girlfriend material you’d like to spend the rest of your life with. If you do find yourself in a situation where you realize you’re just a walking, talking ATM to her, cut the ties, and move on, no matter how much you love her yourself. Such a relationship is unlikely to work out in the long run.
Relationships with bar girls.
For the uninitiated, the term Bar girls refer to women who work in GoGo bars and girly bars all over Thailand. These girls sell themselves for money. Their main goal in the bar is to make you spend as much money as possible on drinks for them called (lady drinks) and drinks for anyone else they can get you to pay for. After that, the next goal is to get even more cash from you by bringing you up to the short time room which is a small usually dimly lit basic room with a bed and a shower. The reason it’s called a short time or S.T. room is that they want you to be in and out in as short a time as possible so they can move on to the next customer and yes by customer I mean client.
Now believe it or not the art of Prostitution is actually illegal in Thailand but in all the years that the business has been operating I have never heard of a single non-Thai (Falang or Farang) as they like to call them ever being arrested or even bothered by the Thai Police. I guess the most logical or cynical reason for this is it just makes the country far too much money.
Back handers and bribes are very prominent around “Disneyland for men” and it never takes more than a few hundred Baht in the right hands to get out of a trip to a police station or even an on the spot parking offence. So it’s not only the bars and the girls that can make money it’s also the police.
So back to the girls. If you walk down any Soi (street) in Thailand’s seedier areas you will often hear the mating call of the native bird that frequents these streets.
Helloooooo sexeeeee mannnnnn…….
You want good time?
I do everything.
I love you long time.
You want to have drink with me and my friends?
Once you hear that mating call it’s very hard to resist and it’s at this point that you either say thank you and keep walking or hold onto your wallet because things are possibly about to get very expensive. A friend of mine once told me “How do you make a small fortune in Thailand? Start with a big one!”
A common nick name for a (Falang, Farang) is A.T.M. As the girls in the bars know that they can push the right buttons and get all the cash they need. You want one girl, two girls or a whole harem as long as you can pay you can have it all.
These girls will love and treat you great but beware…….. Once the money runs out usually so do the girls.
Sometimes it can leave a guy feeling angry or perplexed. I mean they just had sex with this girl so there is a special bond now. Maybe he feels the little butterflies in his stomach and hears wedding bells because he has never been treated so well by a woman before. This girl will even cut his toe nails if he asked so it definitely had to be true love. NO NO NO.
This is a business and like any business, you get what you pay for and if you can’t pay you don’t get.
To coin a popular Thai bar girl phrase “No money, no honey”
These are the only two rules of engagement if you decide to go down the Bargirl route.
So, are bar girl’s bad people?
Of course not. They are for the most part very loveable, funny and misunderstood women. Most are just poor girls (usually from Issan or Udon Thani) with no prospects for a better life. For most of them, they don’t choose to stay in the game. The game chooses them. The sad facts where uneducated girls are concerned are that if they are lucky enough to be pretty then they can either work on the farm or work as a prostitute.
If they are unlucky and got hit with the ugly stick then the only real choice for them is to work on the farm and maybe marry a Thai man who will most likely treat them like garbage and cheat on them with a Gik (The Thai slang name for what they call a small wife which is basically a lover) It’s such a common thing with Thai men that yes they gave it a name all to itself. So faced with those choices wouldn’t you take your chances and head to glitz of the Pattaya nightlife or Khaosan Road in search of the cash cow.
Given the option of getting filthy dirty, being hot and poor with no prospects of ever finding a good man can you blame these girls for playing the game?
Why do Thai girls end up working at the bar?
The long-term goal for these girls is to meet that white knight, the man that will take them away from all this and provide them with a comfortable life away from it all. That can’t be achieved picking rice in 40-degree heat up to your knees in mud.
Now, remember when I said “uneducated” well do not mistake this for stupidity because one thing a Thai girl does not suffer from is stupidity. They are cunning, they are smart and most of all they are survivors. They will do what it takes to get what they want and sometimes like the long con in your favourite heist movie this can be played out for months or even years. They have all day every day to plan the next move and more often than not have more than one prospect on the line.
These girls only need to be your girl for an hour a day for maybe 2 weeks in the year and for the other 50 weeks, they work their magic on numerous guys in exactly the same situation as you. They employ every trick in the book to make you feel like you are the “one”
In some scenarios, you can be lucky enough to actually become the one and contrary to public opinion there are many happily married women that have worked as bar girls and even more from bars that are in solid stable relationships with men that they have met on the job. Don’t forget though that it’s not just the girl that needs to be able to adjust and cope with the guy but also the guy has to be able to accept what the girl used to do and be able to deal with the jealousy and doubt that it brings to the relationship.
Also, keep in mind that the crazy fun loving bar girl you partied the night away with was really in most cases only drinking as it made her money and once she leaves the bar will actually in many cases not drink again – you’ll be surprised how often these former bar girls turn out to be the “nice girl next-door” types once she’s out of the bar. Finally, bear in mind that everything you do with her she has done to a thousand men before you and that’s not an easy thing to deal with. Jealousy is one of the main problems that face a couple that try to make a go of things under these circumstances.
You will always read about the terrible girls from the bars and how they treated the poor Falang but the truth is that in many relationships it’s the guy that can’t cope and in the end pushes the girl away. These are the stories you hear about because some men would rather look like another victim to the terrible Thai girls than having to admit to himself that he is not the understanding and rational guy he thought he was. This often translates into a common advice you’ll find on many websites stating “you can take the girl out of the bar, but you can never take the bar out of the girl”
The two week millionaire
The girl is not always to blame for her extravagant actions. There is a man called a two-week millionaire and on many occasions that man is you. You go on holiday to Thailand with money you have saved up all year and then proceed to flash it around and spend like it means nothing to you. Now put yourself in the shoes of a not so well off girl. Seeing how you have a blatant lack of concern for cash she then thinks ok if you’re going to spend it then you may as well spend it on her. So my advice, don’t act like you’re a millionaire unless you have the funds to back it up and don’t get upset if a girl tries to get some of that cash when you make it so appealing and easy for her in the first place.
Do Thai girls care about your age or looks?
Google any search term relating to Thailand women and you can be sure you will get a hundred sites leading you to online dating sites, lad’s holiday websites or sex worker websites. Complete with scantily clad and sexy Thai girls, you’ll be promised you can you can have sex with Thai girls by simply paying a bar fine and then some. And to be fair, they wouldn’t be wrong in saying so.
After all Thailand is the place synonymous with seedy underground massage parlours and girly bars full of sexy Thai girls who are more than eager to please you. A place where anyone can buy anything as long as they have a full wallet and an empty heart. The women are easy and any guy with the budget of a two-week millionaire can pull any woman they want regardless of what he looks like. That’s a fact right?
Well yes and no. Thailand does have that side to it but then again so does Amsterdam or Las Vegas. In fact when you look deeply enough most countries in the world have their own little red light district. It’s human nature after all for men (and more so these day’s women) to want a little adult entertainment when on vacation. Pattaya and Phuket being prime areas for this along with Khaosan and Soi Cowboy in Bangkok. The Romans were known for their orgies and raucous parties and who could forget Vietnam during the 70’s when the only jobs where women could make a living were in the brothels servicing the American soldiers.
Thailand used to be different, it had its own areas where a guy could go for some adult recreation and to answer the above question I guess it didn’t really matter what he looked like or how old he was. The Dollar was King and you could live like Julius Caesar for a few weeks on a relatively small budget.
I say “could” because over the past few years I have noticed an extreme change in all that. I don’t know whether it’s the influx of mobile phones and social media or if it’s down to the fact that more and more young men are flooding into The Kingdom of Thailand. Gone are the days where lads hopped the plane for a 3-hour flight to Ibiza or Tenerife. Gone are the weekend trips to Amsterdam for a stag night.
A few years ago as you stepped off your flight at Bangkok Airport hoping to meet beautiful Thai girls all you would see would be an ocean of balding middle aged pot-bellied men wearing socks and sandals and sporting the latest designs in sleeveless vests. These were the men that had saved for a year to be that King, to be worshipped by the hordes of beautiful women that worked the bars and clubs of Walking Street or Patpong but that has all changed now. These young Thai girls have more choice now – someone their own age. The young have invaded the once wrinkled streets of Thailand seeking their soulmate with a good family and the myth that they don’t care about how you look or how old you are has become just that, a myth. The sight of a single Thai girl dating young a western guy is pretty commonplace these days. Even more so now because things like online dating in Thailand has opened up the pool of “available” men significantly.
To be honest if you came to Thailand thinking that all women were like the bar girls you would be in for a shock. They (that is to say non bar girls) are very very different to the type portrayed in the movies or sleazy tabloids. They are sophisticated and driven. They know what they want and given the right circumstances they go out and get it. They will not settle for second best and god help you if you try to treat them like anything other than a respectable lady.
They have hearts and feelings and although many will never show their feelings in public you better believe that they love and feel just like you or me. In that respect, they are like any other race. They fall in love with all sorts. I mean you can’t help who you fall for and being handsome is no guarantee that you will land that seductive Thai woman. Yes looks are obviously important because in any culture it’s what you first see that attracts people to each other but once that infatuation and excitement dissipates then just like anyone else the true feelings come up and how you behave or how you treat them becomes the big factor in how a relationship proceeds and succeeds but do Thai ladies care about looks and age? Of course, they do just like any other culture. This by no means is to say they are not willing to look past your age or looks if they find someone they believe is right for them!
The innocent Thai girl who married a monster
In their own words, check out the story of this cute couple who are now happily married. Of course, it wasn’t easy, but they were willing to go the extra mile to make their relationship work. If you’d like to know more about their journey, you can check out their blog post.
Are Thai girls easy to bed?
In the Internet world we have so many choices. It’s hard to believe that full public use of the Internet really only happened around 20 years ago. The Internet itself has been around for over 30 years but unless you were rich you couldn’t really access it. Did you know that Facebook was only launched in 2004? That’s only 13 years ago. Can you remember what you did for entertainment 14 years ago? Can you remember how you found a date 15 years ago?
I can… It sure wasn’t from an online dating site. Very few people were aware of online dating in Thailand and there weren’t any Thai dating sites back then, to begin with (or for that matter other Asian dating sites).
I went out with friends, I talked with people in person and I got rejected many times. That was the procedure. It was painful, it was annoying and it was time-consuming. Most of all it was bloody expensive. All the drinks I bought for girls not to mention the friends they had with them but it was all worth it because you were always guaranteed a good night once the pub closed.
Oh wait! That rarely if ever happened. No, what really happened was you bought them all drinks; you talked and had a laugh then just as you thought things were progressing another guy asked her to dance and that was that.
So what kind of a girl is right for me?
It’s really all about knowing what you want. No one can answer that but you. I can share my experience with you, but you need to evaluate your relationship and the decision by yourself.
You’ve seen a brief overview on the psyche of Thai girls and some of the classes that they come from.
You’ll need to ask yourself “Who will I be happy with the most?”
Do you want the girl who comes from the poorer families but is much simpler and more realistic in the way that they live their lives? Or maybe you want a girl from the middle-class group of Thailand who has a fairly good education and works hard all the time? Perhaps you’d want a girl from the elite groups in Thailand who lives the high life but also demands the same from their man?
It’s all about perspective and knowing what you want in your girl and what makes the two of you happy.
The moment you’ve decided on what you want in your girl, you’ll be able to identify them a lot easier with all of the tips I’ve given you thus far. It’ll be much easier to communicate and understand them now that you have a much broader perspective when it comes to Thai girls and Thai culture.
But know this: always expect that whatever type girl you might pick to be your next girlfriend is not going to be perfect. She might fit the bill and all and might even be your dream girl…
Just remember though, no one is perfect and you’ll have problems in the future, believe me. Everyone does!
It’s all about how you handle those challenges. If you work together as a team with one harmonious mind, you’ll be able to overcome obstacles more easily. That’s why it’s really important to know what type of girl you want!
Nevertheless, these girls will not disappoint you if you’re looking for a girl who can please you and have fun.
Like I mentioned earlier, learn to have an open mind! Find a nice Thai girl and she will show you that no matter how different you may be from another person, you can always have a great relationship with that person even if you happen to come from two different worlds.
I will leave you with these final words of advice.
Don’t mistake a regular girl with a Thai bar girl.
They love romantic drama as I mentioned already with the cheesy TV shows. So let them feel like they are part of the show. Be romantic but don’t overdo it. (Remember. No flowers.)
They love the simple things in life – nice food, a comfortable home and a nice guy that treats them well.
They love their family but you can become part of that family and she will love you forever.
Always pack your sun cream, your heartburn tablets, your stomach tablets (for what’s going in and more so what may come out.) and never ever feed Thai girls after midnight…