We have all had relationships where the guy exits the door within weeks. Needless to say, women have a history of dating players for the ‘fun of it’ and the no strings attached intimacy. But when it comes to settling down with someone, a player is the last person that comes to their mind. Why? Because players are players and their game has many other women in it. A player rarely shows signs of being boyfriend or husband material and that is because they haven’t really grown up much.
A man being a player might also be because of his insecurities that push him to not settle with anyone and a fear of commitment that ruins all his dates, making it fancy numbers. However, the case is, one thing is clear throughout the world – Women don’t prefer players even if they are with one.
Most of the women in a relationship at one point or the other want to know if they are unknowingly with a player or intentionally with a keeper. There is no way a woman can ask her man this question directly until she is drunk out of her senses or doesn’t care about the outcome of being brutally honest. For those of you who have a hard time trying to understand if the man you are dating is a player or a keeper, here is how you can check:
He Makes You Happy
The very thought of him makes you happy and you smile from your liver. Literally. The smile is infectious that it gets to everyone around you. He knows how to make his girlfriend smile and he knows that it will be on her mind all day. A man who knows exactly what makes his girl feel special is a keeper. Treasure him with all your heart ladies.
You Can Be You With Him
You don’t have to dress up and have makeup on all the time. He likes you just the way you are, even with your t-shirt and messy bun no makeup look on a Sunday morning. You are not afraid to show how you are in the comfort of your home, in front of him.
What’s more better? He doesn’t expect you to be the woman of his dreams. His dream is for you to be you and him to witness that. He doesn’t push you to look a certain way and always ends up admiring you just the way you are. He is the person who wakes you up in the morning with a kiss on the forehead even if you are sick and runny nose.
He is proud of you
Unlike a player, a keeper actually knows things about you. If you won the spelling bee contest when you were in school, your keeper knows that. Even if he wasn’t in your life at that time, he still thinks its pretty cool that you won a competition like that, and does not fail to applaud for you. He talks proudly about you to his friends and family and does not wait to show off about his girlfriend when she has achieved something new.
He encourages you
Your boyfriend encourages you to live your dream no matter how ridiculous it sounds. This is a clear sign that he is a keeper. Instead of slapping rational sense into your head, he is willing to give the benefit of the doubt and encourages you on all your wild choices because he knows that when things go south, he would be there to console you.
A man who lets his woman make her own decisions and is waiting with open arms to congratulate her when she wins and embrace comfort if she fails is the kind of man a woman would want for a lifetime. If you have already someone like that, then congratulations. Don’t let go of him ladies.
He is not ashamed to introduce you
He is not the type that hesitates to introduce you to his friends or family. In fact, he proudly talks about you in his circle and wants you to get to know about his friends and family. A keeper is steady in his decisions and is not afraid to take his girl to meet his folks. He is comfortable enough to let you into his own circle and trusts you enough to introduce everyone to you. He wants his circle to know that he is dating a gem and wants you to know that you are always going to be getting more out of him.
He surprises you
A keeper always has surprises ready for his woman because he knows that it is the little things that matter to women. Your boyfriend might surprise you with dinner of your favourite meal back home when you return from a long day at work. He loves to surprise you with flowers and a small note written by him that arrives at your desk to jump start your day. He never fails to amaze you and is always around to make you smile more.
He Feeds You
A keeper cares for you and that includes caring if you are taking your meals properly. He does not hesitate to make coffee for you because he knows that you need your morning shot of caffeine to survive through the day. He knows that you would be hungry after an exceptionally long day and orders your favourite cuisine so that you can unwind and have a great meal in the comfort of your living room. He feeds you and makes sure that his girlfriend is happy. A keeper knows that food solves most of the problems.
He doesn’t give reasons
If he is late he apologizes. He makes sure that it doesn’t repeat again. A keeper never makes excuses as a part of living. He is always willing to do more for you. He doesn’t give petty reasons for doing something that he did. A keeper gives you honest and valid reasons and makes it impossible for you to stay mad at him.
His problems are his
A keeper never puts his problems on you, treating you less than what you deserve. He never lets his insecurities get in the way of treating you well. Even when it does, he is right back up to correct his mistakes and wants to make sure that you are truly and entirely okay. A keeper doesn’t rest until he makes sure that his woman is fine and he hasn’t imposed his problems on her, adding to her worry.
He doesn’t hurt you
A keeper is more mature and wants to make the relationship work. He never does anything that hurts you. He knows what hurts you and what doesn’t and tries his level best to make sure that he doesn’t hurt you.
A keeper does not stop with ‘I love you’. He actually means it every time he says it and when he doesn’t he proves it to you that he does. Hurting his woman, even unintentionally is not something a keeper does. He cares for his girlfriend or wife like she was the most precious gem in the world and makes you feel that you are safe when you are with him.
You feel an instant warmth and protection when you are curled up in his arms. You feel that you are in the safest place ever and there is no way anything can ever hurt you when you are with your boyfriend or husband. Dating him is the best thing that ever happened to you and he tries his level best to keep it that way.
He is stable
He doesn’t give you the regular dating effect of wanting to meet up on a particular day and then cancelling the last minute. He does not make plans in thin air. He is stable and he knows what he is up to. A keeper never cancels, unless its really important that he does so.
When asked about his future plans, no matter how near or far they are, he has a well sketched out and stable plan. He does not fix on two or more things and he knows exactly what he wants and follows his heart for it. You can actually imagine a future with the stable minded keeper.
You are in his future
When he talks about his future, he makes references of you in it. He does not say that “10 years from now he would be in his own beach house in Florida”. Rather, he says that “10 years from now, he looks forward to seeing you in his own beach house in Florida”. A keeper actually has plans of settling down with his woman and does not date for time pass or play. He sees potential in you and dates you because he thinks you are perfect for his future. \
He dates you because he sees you as someone with whom he has chances of spending his whole lifetime with. He makes his future plans with you in it and leaves room for your own choices too. He does not decide your future, but he surely does convince you to think about it.
You want him after a hard day
Boring meetings and nearing deadlines are all in the office. When you are in the office, even if you are caught under piles of paperwork, you still look forward to going home to him. A keeper checks on you no matter what, to make sure that you are okay or if you need anything. A keeper is always available to help you when you want and he makes you feel that he is just around the corner.
After a long day at work, all you want to do is go home to him. The very thought of going back home to him lights up your day and you are brighter than ever in your workplace. Once you go home, you know for a fact that you have left all the worry behind you and that once you entered home, you reached your keeper’s zone for peace and tranquillity.
You are best friends
You are dating. But you are also really good friends. While people say that it is wise to date your best friend because you both know each other very well, dating someone who can possibly become your best friend is all the better. First, you can steer clear of the awkwardness that comes with dating your friend for a few days.
When you are getting to know your keeper more, you know that not only is he a good boyfriend, he is also a really good friend. And what more? He would be more than delighted to let you be his friend. You would be in a relationship and still remain best friends. Even if you have a fight, you know how to fix it because your keeper is your friend too and he knows that you need him to cry to.
You can talk just about anything
You can tell a keeper almost anything and he won’t judge you for it. A keeper knows his girl inside out and knows when she joking and when she is serious. He knows that sometimes, you just need to rant a little bit and sometimes, venting makes you feel good. So he is always there to dodge the bullets.
A keeper does not stay away when you are on your period or does not let you deal with your mood swings alone. Instead, he sticks around to pacify you and help you remain peaceful no matter what. He takes complete care of you and makes sure that even in ‘those days’ you are treated like a princess.
He gives you massages
Knowing that his woman has had a long day, a keeper does not hesitate to give his woman a massage if need be so. He is more than willing to massage your feet if you have been standing all day and is more than willing to offer you a back massage if you are moaning and groaning each time you move. He is your care taker and sees that his princess is ready for the next day, from the massages he gives today.
He knows your friends
He is comfortable talking to your friends and he also becomes friends with them. He lets your friends be honest and comfortable towards him and he knows that making your girl gang warm up to him is a major turn on for you. He becomes an approved member in your girl gang and all your friends are going crazy over how you have got a wonderful partner. This is a strong sign that he is a keeper.
A keeper does not restrict his woman from talking to her friends even if he thinks that they are up to no good. He tries to politely convince his woman and talk it out with her, instead of directly telling her to stay away.
Dating him is not complicated
With a keeper around, you can never say that your relationship is complicated. A keeper knows that complicated relationships are a thing of the past and never hesitates to make it clear about where the relationship is heading to. Since he is a firm believer and follower of stability, he knows that a relationship which is stable means it’s a happy one. His stability reassures you and you find yourself in a distinguished and happy place, rarely thinking of calling your relationship as complicated.
You are growing
A keeper gives you a happy relationship where you and he can grow. Both of you benefit majorly from the relationship and learn a lot, becoming better individuals. He teaches you a lot about life’s little things – compassion, gratitude and importantly, how to remain happy. A keeper makes you independent enough to know what is good for you and what is not. A relationship with a keeper gives you a clearer vision.
You laugh together
When there is a joke that you recently came across, the first person you want to share it with is your boyfriend. You are used to sharing jokes and laughing together and you do that often. A keeper tries just about anything to see that little smile on your face and laughing together surely reassures him that he is treating his woman well.
These are some of the signs through which you can identify if your boyfriend is a keeper. Even if your boyfriend shows about five of the signs mentioned here, he is a catch. Just wait for a few days and you will see more of these signs surfacing in his qualities. Every woman deserves to be treated like a princess and every keeper chooses to treat his woman like she is the most important person in the whole wide world. Know this and you will know that you should always stick to keeping a keeper in your life.