Scores of foreign men are looking to date and marry Thai women. While western man may be used to dating western women, when it comes to dating Thai women, there are several factors that they need to be aware of. From the language barrier, to the cultural differences to the nuances of the Thai society, its always a good idea to have a sense and understanding of your partners cultural heritage.
There are plenty of blogs out there have negatively stereotyped all Thai women, giving the impression that no good can come out of a relationship with Thai women. The reason for negative stereotyping is largely due to the conduct of a few, that give an entire class a bad name. However, this most certainly not representative of the larger population. The secret of a successful relationship with Thai women is just a function of you finding the right partner for you.
Where to meet Thai women for dating?
Before we answer that question, there is an even more important question that ought to be answered first which is, where NOT to look for a Thai woman when looking for a long term relationship?
We’ve said this before, and we’ll say this again here, because too many people still fall for it.
The single biggest mistake men make while looking for a Thai wife or partner is that they look for it in the wrong place – the bar.
This route although easy, often ends up being the most disastrous as well. A quick search on on the internet will result in an endless stream of horror stories of Thai-farang relationships gone bad.
This cannot be stressed enough. If you are looking for a Thai bride or a partner for a long term relationship, skip the bar (and other related establishments). If you are even remotely considering taking this route, read our article on the subject of bar girls first.
So, where do you meet the right Thai women?
We’re so glad you asked! We’ll take this opportunity to shamelessly promote our own dating app – thisDating. Tons of women from Thailand (and several other countries too) join thisDating every day, looking for relationships with western men. You can easily browse profiles and exchange messages to get to know them. So, go ahead, download the app and take the first to finding yourself the Thai bride of your dreams. Its easy, its convenient and its totally free to signup.
You would be elated to find a number of young and modern Thai girls who are looking for partners on thisDating. Most of these girls are looking forward to date foreigners and even marry them. If you are looking for young Thai brides, thisDating should be your first choice. The best part is, this way you can interact with many women, without ever having to set foot in another country.
At this point, we would also like you to read up our article on online dating safety to be aware of the pitfalls on and encourage you exercise proper judgement at all times. Its really imperative that you fully make yourself aware of best practices when it comes to dating online, and watch out for warning signals at all times.
What kind of women can I expect to meet?
On thisDating, you’ll meet beautiful Thai women from all walks of life – professionals, self employed, business women, students, government employees, teachers, etc. While each individual is different, their educational background and upbringing can have an effect on their personalities which can broadly be classified in these major groups.
- Limited education
Typically from rural regions of Thailand, these women may be high school educated or may have a vocational degree. You can expect them to be far more traditional than those in the other two groups. English (or any other foreign language) ability might be non-existent. For the same reason, you might struggle to strike up long conversations with them (in English). Exposure to western culture might be also be non-existent, and given the language barrier, adapting the western way of life might be a long and tedious process.
If is safe to assume that in most cases, her family will have limited financial resources and limited education as well. Although women in this group would be happy to permanently settle down in your home country, she is unlikely to be able to find a job and would necessarily be a dependent house wife. In some cases, her family may also have an expectation from you to support them financially.
The odds of a successful relationship with someone from this group will really depend on whether either of you is willing to go the extra mile to adapt to each others cultures and lifestyle. If you’re specifically looking for a partner that has the typical Thai characteristics, this is it. For others however, it may be too much of an effort than they might be willing to deal with.
- University educated
The majority of women you are likely to meet online, will be from this group. Women in this group are likely to be the working class with a steady day job. Most of them will be able to carry on a conversation with passable English on a variety of subject matter. Women in this group are most likely living in one of Thailand’s urban areas and earning between 20,000 and 40,000 Baht a month, which might be enough to support themselves.
Exposure to western culture might be limited to what they might have seen in the movies or TV. Adaptability to western culture might be middling. Depending on her specific skills, she may or may not be able to get a job in your home country. The odds of a successful relationship are highest in this group assuming compatible lifestyle and values.
Single women in this group might be open to permanently settling down in your home country, but single moms with with kids may or may not want to permanently relocate to another country depending on the age of her kids and whether she prefers a western or Thai upbringing for her children.
- The over achievers
These are women who are very well educated, successful, career oriented, and are likely holding high positions in their jobs – think senior management at top MNC’s, doctors, lawyers, etc. Women in this group may come from a middle class or an affluent family. She might be used to having a domestic help and other life’s luxuries. Women in this group are likely to be fluent in English and will be able to carry out conversations quiet easily.
They likely have traveled overseas and might also be well versed with the western culture. Most of the women in this group would be earning enough to support themselves as well as their families. You can expect these women to also expect their partners to be equally successful in their respective fields of expertise. Adaptability to western culture might be high, but she may or may not want to permanently settle in another country depending on her goals and aspirations.
How do I know if she is trustworthy?
Most Thai girls you will meet online are trustworthy. In most cases, they are looking for the same thing you are looking for – a loving, faithful, responsible and caring partner, and in general you can trust them to not cheat on you. However, be aware that as with everything else in life, there are and always will be exceptions. We understand it might not be easy to access someone so far away, so we’ll share some basic advice here:
First, ensure you have read our guide on online dating safety that lists out the common red flags to watch out for.
Second, assuming that you are looking to forge a long term relationship or perhaps even marrying her, access her background and profession to see if she is someone you would like to spend the rest of you life with.
Do note that a single instance of any of the behaviors listed in the preceding articles may not automatically imply the worst. But do look out for repeating patterns and exercise proper judgement at all times.
The next step – the first meeting
Congratulations! So you’ve been chatting with someone for a while and are ready to take the next step – meeting in person. It would be safe to assume that in almost every case, you, the westerner, will be traveling to her country for the in-person meeting.
Choose an appropriate place
Having decided to meet in person, choose and invite her to a place she might be comfortable with – public places are best, for her as well as your own safety. We recommend a movie followed by lunch or dinner – the movie will give you enough talking points to avoid any awkward silences.
Be culturally aware
Be sensitive to her – Remember, most Thai women are conservative in nature. If this is the first time you are meeting, don’t be too surprised if she chooses to bring a friend along.
Also be aware of the fact that for Thai’s, English is a foreign language, and your lady might already be embarrassed for her limited English ability. You might struggle to understand her or make yourself understood. So speak slowly using simple words and phrases, especially if you have a strong accent. Know that its a lot more difficult to understand when someone is speaking in a foreign language as opposed to chatting, because she cant use a dictionary on the fly as you speak.
Most people are proud of their country, culture, traditions and heritage. Your Thai girl will expect you to show respect to her, her country, culture, traditions and her family. Avoid making rude or offensive comments on any of these subjects.
Thai girls know how to look good. They are feminine and take care of their looks. Applying makeup, wearing the right dress, matching it up with accessories, is a big thing to them. Do you get the hint? Your Thai date will also expect you to make an effort to look good for her. This isn’t necessarily about looking handsome – just basic hygiene and ability to take care of oneself. So while a tie and jacket may not be necessary, don’t just go out with her in your sweatpants either. Wear proper clothes (a button down shirt would be ideal), get a shave (or get a neat trim if you’re a beard person), cut your nails and smell good. By doing these simple things you would convey to her that you are serious in your efforts and that would score some brownie points with her.
Be a gentleman
Limit alcohol and smoking. While most women would consider it socially acceptable to drink, no woman, in her right senses would like to marry a drunkard. So, behave yourself and limit your alcohol intake. Be friendly to her. Make a few jokes. You’ll quickly get into her good books if you treat her nicely – assist her while crossing road, open doors for her, pickup the tab, etc.
Avoid physical touch. Even though there might be exceptions, public display of affection is still not a norm in Thai culture. So avoid physical touch beyond holding hands such as hugging or kissing. If you feel the date is going well and she seems to like you, you may ask for her permission to hold hands while at movies.
Expect the spend the night alone
As stated previously, most Thai women are conservative. Its just not Thai culture so sleep with someone they’ve just met. For most Thai women, physical intimacy is a very emotional aspect of a relationship that can create new feelings and obligations and can be a stressful experience for her if the relationship does not eventually take off. So allow yourself a few dates before you invite her to your place.
Next, read our guide on how to have a great first date so that your conversation will land you a second date with her.
Use your first meeting to make an earnest attempt to understand her as a person. Ask her about her aspirations. Share yours. If she is asking you questions about your life, your work there is a good chance the date is going well and she probably likes you. Use this opportunity to try to get a sense of what she expects from this relationship.
In short, be nice – its not too much to ask for, and that’s generally enough to land you a second date with her. Its really just a few things that women want from the man of her dreams.
Beyond the first date
If you had a good first date, give her a call to let her know how you felt about the date. As a man, it would be your responsibility to make a follow on call. If both of you seem to have enjoyed your time with each other, it might be appropriate to ask her out for a second date.
Its never a good idea to rush a relationship. If she agrees to go out with you on several dates it would be safe to assume she likes you. If after several dates both of you seem to have developed a liking for each other it might be appropriate to take the relationship to the next level. For most Thai women, its going to take a sincere attempt and a show of commitment from you, before she would be willing to take the relationship to the next level before she says I love you.
Thai families are very close knit, and its common for children to live with their parents well into their adulthood. If this is the case with your Thai girlfriend, it will be very difficult for her to move in with you. Most Thai families will not approve of their daughter to move in with her boyfriend before marriage. However, if she lives independently, it might be possible for her to move in with you, while you’re courting each other. Do note that, a typical Thai will choose not to move in with you until she has strong feelings for you and believes your feelings reciprocate hers.
In the west, it might be the norm for both the partners to share expenses when they move in and start living together. However, in Thai culture, the man is considered the head of the family. He is expected to take care of all financial matters of the family. For this reason, your Thai girlfriend might expect you to continue to take of daily expenses such as meals and rent when she moves in with you. If you are unable to afford, or expect her to get a job and share some of the financial responsibilities back in your home country, you might want to discuss the matter with her sooner rather than later.
Sometimes, its also possible that you end up in a long distance relationship, because you live in another county and neither of you are in a position to migrate to the others country. In such a scenario, you may not be able to see each other often and that can lead to moments of frustration and agony causing cracks in the relationship. As hard as it may be, long distance relationships can be made to work.
Its never a pleasant experience to end a relationship. The longer you’ve been in a relationship, the harder it gets. This is especially true when one person still in love with the other. If you would like to end the relationship, it would be best to sit her down and let her know in no confusing terms, while making sure not to use any harsh language. Its also important that you share your reasons honestly. As hard as it may be, its the best way. A clean exist is always recommended to avoid any awkward encounters in case you run into her at a later point in time.
Appreciate the fact that a breakup might be an highly emotional experience for her and she may continue to stalk you (online or otherwise). No matter how big her initial reaction, its important you explain to her why its the best decision for both of you in a polite yet unambiguous terms. You might also want to limit communication with her after the breakup, to allow her to transition out of your life quicker, especially if the breakup was not mutual.
If she is the one breaking up with you, while you still have feelings for her, it might be best to stop all communication, at least until you’ve lost you feelings for her.
Whatever your reason for breakup and irrespective of whomsoever’s decision it was, its import for both of you to realize that life does not end with a breakup.
Having a Thai women can be a rewarding and fulfilling experience. However, the cultural and lifestyle difference can make interracial relationships somewhat of a bumpy ride but nothing that cannot be handled with a little bit of understanding, willingness to adapt and respect towards each others culture and heritage. The sheer number of western men who have had a long and successful relationship with Thai women is testament to the fact that Thai women make great lifelong companions.
If you are in a long term relationship with a Thai women, we would love to hear from you. Please share your story in the comments below. What worked for you? What made you choose a Thai women as your partner?