Hi! My name is Waen, a 20-something Thai lady who was born and raised in the picturesque city of Khon Kaen. As a part-time tour guide, Thai-English translator and a freelance writer and photographer, I am blessed to be traveling around my beautiful country most of the year. While I still call Khon Kaen my home, I spend majority of my time around Bangkok, Pattaya and Phuket among other towns and cities around Thailand as part of my job.
I meet a lot of people every day, thanks to my work. Not only do I have the chance to communicate and hang around with a lot of Thai men and women of all ages, I also learn plenty of things about the rest of the world from the tourists and expats I constantly mingle with. One thing in common among a lot of foreign men I get to interact with — they ask me what they need to do or how they can adjust their dating or courting style to win the heart of Thai woman.
Thai ladies are very attractive and I’m not even saying this because I’m biased. We do pretty well in beauty pageants and because our body frames and faces are usually small and very feminine, you can’t blame men from all over the world to flock to Thailand not only to see our amazing tourist destinations, but also to possibly grab that chance to date or even settle with a Thai woman.
If you are one of those who are still wondering about ways on how you can adjust or change your style so you can successfully attract a Thai woman, read on and I’ll do my best to help you out.
Where to Meet Thai Women
Here’s a common misconception — you have to go out to the night clubs or bars to find a Thai lady who might be interested in foreign men like you. Truth be told, if you know how to approach a lady, no matter the nationality, you don’t have to go to some bar just to communicate and possibly ask for a date.
I really don’t want to say anything negative about other Thai ladies, but of course, some “beer bars” have Thai women or bar girls who will jump at the chance of being around foreign men. Let me make this brief — not all Thai women care about your money or the chance of going around the world with you. Some bar girls are exceptions. If you really want to impress that cute Thai girl who you might get serious with later on, acting superior just because you’re a foreigner is a big no-no.
There are many places where you can meet attractive, single and ready to mingle Thai ladies. For instance, as a tour guide, I have witnessed plenty of Thai-foreigner relationships blossom from brief encounters that turned to serious dating and even marriage!
Let me share with you a story about an American man, Robert, who came to Thailand with his friends. I happened to tour them around Pattaya and Bangkok for three days. During this period, he met a Bangkok girl who happened to be a teacher. Their chance encounter happened inside a coffee shop while the Thai woman was enjoying a cup of tea with her own set of friends. He managed to get her number as the lady knew basic English.
Michael asked my assistance in translating some of the woman’s messages while I was touring them around. After our three-day tour ended, I learned that he met with her in Bangkok before he flew back home. I received an email from Michael a couple of months after that as he was planning to go back to Thailand. Apparently, he and the Thai lady hit it off well and are now in a serious relationship.
There are countless bars and nightclubs around Thailand. Yes, you can possibly find a nice lady in one of those places and you probably won’t have a hard time approaching them. Most of the time, ladies who hang out in these bars are happy to go out on dates with local or foreign men, as long as the man is interesting enough. However, these aren’t the only places in Thailand where you can meet lovely ladies or the one who might just be your destiny!
Thai women who are ready to date are everywhere — from bars, coffee, shops, malls, parks, tourist attractions, beaches and more! You just need to have the right attitude so that you can be successful in getting to know more about her.
The Language Barrier Factor
Our names alone seem complicated to foreigners. Extremely long Thai names are common and many foreigners who come visit us have a hard time pronouncing our names, so I stick to my nickname Waen. It’s short and sweet, and easy for tourists I guide to remember and understand.
In Thailand, there are numerous languages and dialects spoken. You’ll be happy to know that English is widely spoken too so you really don’t have to carry a Thai-English dictionary around. Thanks to Google, you can also easily translate Thai words spoken to you, but you may need someone to spell it out to be sure. Most Thai men and women in Bangkok, as well as many tourist destinations know who to speak at least basic English.
However, there’s still a language barrier factor when it comes to dating Thai women. Unless you find someone who speaks straight English without a problem, then consider yourself lucky. Believe me, I’ve had several foreign male clients who hired me just to translate an email or help them write love letters to Thai women.
The good thing about this is that as mentioned, technology has helped many of us answer the language barrier problem. While a continuous conversation such as when you’re out on a date can be a challenge when you’re with a Thai lady who speaks little English, this proves to be just a small problem in the long run; especially if you’re with someone who you absolutely adore.
Don’t think that Thai women will get tired if they are having a hard time talking to you. If they really like you, the challenge is worth it. If I spoke little English, I still wouldn’t mind dating a foreign man because body language and mutual understanding are always worth more than words.
Here are some quick tips — if you find speaking with Thai ladies who know little to no English very challenging, make sure you have your smartphone charged so you can Google words anytime. Just type Thai-English Dictionary on Google and you’re good to go. And yes, you can still carry the old school dictionary because it can do wonders for you, especially when you’re out on your first date!
Don’t feel bad if we sometime murmur Thai words in between our sentences. More often than not, it’s not something negative about you. Sometimes we just want to express our thoughts in our native language because it’s way easier. It doesn’t matter if you understand, for as long as we get those words or thoughts out of our system.
The Grand Introduction
In my humble opinion, Thai women are not entirely different from other women all over the world. Of course, there are cultural differences but when it comes to our hearts and minds, we’re just like most women.
Thai women are different from each other too. Some like men who are upfront and would say hello immediately while others prefer taking it slow. As a man, it is now up to you to gauge whether a Thai lady is interested in talking to you.
If you are absolutely clueless about what you’re going to do during the introduction phase, here’s what I can suggest:
- Eye contact — Look at her, smile and try your best to look friendly. If she smiles back or she looks into your eyes in return, then you might have a good chance. If she ignores you completely but you are really attracted to her, then try pursuing eye contact again or come over and say hello.
- No means no — If she says no or if she refuses to talk to you, respect that. Most often than not, this could mean that she really isn’t interested. Perhaps she already has a boyfriend or maybe she’s even married. Sometimes, she might not be in a good mood or she’s busy with something more important like work. If you really like her, then try talking to her friends or colleagues so they can help you out in connecting with her. And if she really refuses to connect with you after exerting a little effort, stop and move on already because you might seem like a creepy stalker if you don’t.
- Don’t come off too strong — I mentioned this earlier on. Don’t be “too strong”. Don’t show that you feel like you’re more superior than her maybe because you were born and raised in a first world country or you are light-skinned, tall and handsome, or you’re an expat who’s earning millions a year while she’s just a regular girl you randomly saw in Thailand. Remember, you’re approaching a lady here. She doesn’t care who you are or where you’re from. Be respectful and humble. First impressions are very important and you want to show her you’re worth her time and attention.
Making the Move
When you have finally found the courage to come up to her and she gladly shared her name and hopefully even her contact number with you, you are on the right track. While a lot of foreigners think that we, Thai women, are very conservative and we’d rather not chat with men who are practically strangers, you’d be surprised that a lot of us are actually great conversationalists — even if many of us speak crooked English.
We love it when you don’t come off too strong — I guess I already established this point well enough above. By my own personal experience, as well as what I’ve seen with many Thai women through the years, the best way to make a move on us is by talking to us. Be friendly. Say hi. Try striking a good conversation. We totally don’t mind.
When it comes to physical contact though, most of us are quite conservative. We’re perfectly fine with dating, eating out, watching a movie together, and even having a couple of bottles of beer; however, you should not try to make a physical move straight away. Perhaps you should wait until after several dates.
Now please don’t generalize this but this is a common occurrence: if you happen to meet a Thai woman in a bar or club and she quickly agrees to sleep with you even on the first date, chances are you’re going out with a bar girl. If you don’t mind that she’s a bar girl, then good for you. Just remember that most of us are conservative. My (ex)-boyfriend and I had our first kiss weeks after we were officially together. Many of my friends don’t sleep with their boyfriends until after they’re married or they had to at least be officially together for a year or so.
Just a clarification: while there are plenty of bar girls around Thailand, there are more Thai ladies who have more decent jobs. We are teachers, writers, doctors, nurses, engineers, architects, tour guides, etc. We can be anything we want to be! There’s only a tiny population of Thai women who are working as bar girls and you probably won’t have a hard time “making the move” with them.
Editor’s Note: Shameless plug right here – if you’re the type who’s having a hard time making the first move in person, we strongly suggest for you to try out our very own dating app so can have the chance to meet beautiful Thai women!
If you are looking for a Thai lady who you want to be in a serious relationship with or even get married with in the future, know that there are so many beautiful Thai women who are honest and have decent and modest jobs — ladies who you can proudly introduce to your parents and the rest of your family.
What Thai Women Like
As I mentioned earlier, Thai women are unique from each other. While we share the same culture and customs, our thoughts and preferences can be different. There are no strict rules when it comes to pursuing or dating a Thai woman. However, if you want a better shot at a Thai lady you’ve met around, here are some tips you can keep in mind.
- Pretty Little Gifts
You don’t have to spend a fortune to impress a Thai woman. Flowers, chocolates, cute teddy bears, pretty handwritten cards and other small gifts are more than enough to make her happy. It’s the thought that counts! What matters is that you remembered her and that you’re making her feel like she matters a lot to you.
- Drop By Her Place of Work
We like it when you show up on our workplace. You don’t have to do it too often though especially if you will be a cause of distraction, but we appreciate it when we feel like you’re interested about what we do. We appreciate it even more when you are proud of what we do and you think highly about our career.
- Go On Dates
Dates are a must. Especially if you’re not from around the area, we appreciate if you take time to research and choose a restaurant for us to eat out instead of always asking for suggestions. However, some Thai women prefer if you ask them first where they want to eat instead. If you’re going on several dates together, take turns in choosing where you will be going.
- Meet Her Friends
Not a lot of men like hanging out with his lady’s group of male and female friends. You should exert an effort to do that. We love it when you are more than willing to hang around with our friends. Remember that you have to be polite yet fun and relaxing to be with. Our friends’ impressions and thoughts about you matter too!
- Don’t Be Too Touchy in Public
Since most Thai women are conservative, hugging and kissing when you’re out in public together must be avoided. If she’s fine with it then you’re okay. If she says no, don’t push it. Respect our culture and how we don’t like being judged by other people — especially our even more traditional and conservative elders.
- Meet Her Parents
Once again, don’t force it if she says she’s not ready yet, but if she is, get ready to have lunch or dinner with her parents. Let her suggest where you should take her parents such as a nice restaurant close to their home. If she is close with her siblings, have them come with you too.
- Be Around and Show Up
When you say you’ll be there, be there. When you promise you’d go out with her today, then you should show up. If you need to leave Thailand for whatever reason, stay in touch with her consistently. Go on video calls, send her text messages, tag her on social media posts. Don’t go missing for more than a couple of days without any word or we’ll definitely be worried and upset.
- Label Your Relationship
As the man in the relationship, you should make the first move in asking her whether or not you are officially together. Tell her exactly how you feel. Let her know whether you’re already her boyfriend or not. We don’t like making the first move especially when it’s serious relationship talk. Make sure you’re on the same page and you understand each other. Always consider her feelings.
- Let Her Know What’s Ahead
Especially if you won’t be in Thailand all the time to be with her, it is best to let her know even early on in the relationship where you’re headed. Are you taking it slow? Do you plan on marrying her in the future? Are you interested in building a family with her? Do you want to bring her with you to your country or would you be moving to Thailand permanently? The future matters. It is best that both of you can set your expectations.
More Ways to Impress a Thai Woman
If you’re really interested in a Thai woman, you should find ways on how to impress her. It’s not too difficult at all as there are so many ways to impress us. We are not very demanding women. We appreciate even the small things. We will even appreciate the fact that you’re looking for ways on how to impress us and make us happy. Here are some tips you can keep in mind:
Let’s Explore the World Together
Many of us love to travel. Just ask her first whether she’s willing to travel with you. Some Thai women can be very conservative and the thought of spending even one night away from home with a man who is not her husband might not be a good idea. But if she’s fine with it, then travel together. There are so many beautiful places around Thailand. You can even consider neighboring Asian countries or even your own country!
Let Us Know Who You Are
Yes, we know your name, where you’re from and what you do, but do we really know you? We like it when you tell us stories about your childhood, friends and family. Describe your home. Show us pictures. Tell us what you feel or simply how your day was. Tell us your future plans and what your dreams are. We love it when you introduce that part of you that not a lot of people know about.
If you’re already dating someone, don’t date anyone else. Be faithful. This is a general dating rule in most, if not all places across the world. Show her that she’s the one and that she’s the only one. Your loyalty will go a long way and she will reciprocate that for sure.
Ask for Our Help
There are so many ways to ask for our help — it can be as simple as asking us for suggestions and following through with it. Make us feel like our thoughts and recommendations matter to you. Make us feel like there are ways that we can help you. Ask us the best place to get your haircut in town or to come with you to the grocery so we can help you choose your food.
You’re a Lucky Man When You’re With a Thai Woman
Thai women are special. The beauty of the Thai woman is not her only asset. We are smart, courageous, humble and respectable. We value our families, our womanhood, our culture and our country.
When you’re going out with a Thai woman, give her importance. You are incredibly lucky to have received the affection of a beautiful lady from our beloved country, Thailand.